Yes! That is correct! The narcissist will not allow you to be happy unless he/she is the reason you are feeling happy. Your happiness must be under their control at all times. Forget about experiencing any happiness in front of them that is caused by anything or anyone other than them.
If you show joy, they will steal that away from you as soon as possible. They will calculate, scheme, plan and then attack when you are experiencing the most joy or they will wait and level you when your whole personality is shining and showing. They cannot stand it when you shine!
How dare you be happy when they are so miserable. You have what they so desperately want — and that is to shine! So they will do whatever they can to take it from you. You see…they feel they own you and therefore they say when you will shine and when you will not. They will act like at the moment, that they like you that way — shining — while they are scheming their attack to later level you and take your shine away.
It is not IF they get the chance to level you, it is WHEN they get the chance because they will find an opportunity to level you. Leveling is what they do best!! Leveling is one of their most treasured practices and be ready for a sickening, “I love you so much” and/or connecting behavior shortly after the leveling.
The narcissist will calm down, sit back, watch and monitor your emotions. You become more comfortable around them because they haven’t been hostile for a couple of weeks. If you start to relax and share with them at all, they will hold back and get as much of that sharing out of you as possible.
Once they feel you are sharing everything you are capable of — and they know you because they have analyzed you thoroughly when you were busy or not paying attention — they move in for the attack! This my friend will NEVER change. So…forget about being free to express your happiness, ever, while you remain in contact with a narcissist.
Do you want to beat narcissism ? This course will get you on your way to your happy place. Never have narcissism in your life again.